It seems that only independence and continuous struggle can resist their barbarism. However, if you really go home, they will definitely try to test you with blind dates. Even if not for blind dates, they will try every means to seize any relationship that can control you, even a little bit.
When he found out I was in a relationship, he slightly understood the situation of the other party and the family. He asked if I was the one who sent me books and notes, inquired about his personality and how he usually treats me. It seemed he didn’t care much about the economic situation of the other family. Of course, regarding economic conditions, maybe my aunt asked him, so there was no need for me to ask. He simply didn’t express any opinions or show any emotional changes. I don’t know if it’s because it’s not yet time to consider marriage or because our family’s financial situation isn’t so good now, so he doesn’t ask for much.
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Bourgeoisie or any exploiting class clearly separates “love” and “marriage”. The reason your father had little reaction is because he knows you’re just “playing around,” or he knows he can casually break you and La Rui Shu apart, making it impossible for you to marry. For the bourgeoisie, marriage is a political and business activity; it has nothing to do with love (of course, in the eyes of the bourgeoisie, love is just pornography, just physical relations). As for whom they like in their daily lives, whom they want to play with, have affairs with, cheat on, or indulge in romantic escapades, that’s another matter. As long as it doesn’t affect actual interests, that is, as long as they maintain a “decent” marriage relationship in name, their private love affairs are irrelevant. So, among bourgeois men, a common occurrence is that some young master pursued “love” in his early years, played with women, but then, under “family pressure” and to marry “someone he doesn’t like,” he abandoned his “first love” (Zhou Puyuan in “Thunderstorm” is like this. Jia Baoyu’s affair with Xiren in “Dream of the Red Chamber” is also like this. The elders of the Jia family don’t care about Jia Baoyu playing with women, but they do care about him marrying Lin Daiyu or Xue Baochai, because they want Jia Baoyu to marry Xue Baochai to form an alliance between Jia family and the “millionaire merchant” Xue family, to mutual benefit). Your father only tolerated your relationship with La Rui Shu because he thought you and him were just “playing.” In fact, he was right and underestimated the situation. If you hadn’t contacted the forum, your relationship with La Rui Shu might have just been a dream, ultimately breaking apart in the face of real class interests. To be straightforward, the method I mentioned earlier to cut off contact with La Rui Shu—advising him to keep dragging you without replying after breaking up—was based on the idea that once you are forced to marry someone by your father, you would “give up,” thus completely solving your love-obsessed problem. But now it seems I was too pessimistic about the situation. Since you are willing to learn and reform with everyone, there’s no need to treat you as just an ordinary bourgeois child. Of course, we welcome you to join the forum, reform yourself, and dedicate yourself to the revolution.
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If you had truly decided to get married back then and insisted on marrying a small bourgeois like Larry Shu, your dad would probably have shown a different face, directly revealing his Confucian patriarchal authoritarian side.
Do you have brothers?
This point, including the behavior you mentioned above where your father sends money home, makes me think of a principle. All investments by capitalists require a return, so they won’t completely give away their things—whether it’s money or time—without expecting anything in return. It’s the same with you; everything he spends on you will definitely be sought back in some way later. It’s just that you’re still young now, he’s still in the investment stage, and hasn’t openly demanded anything from you yet.
My family has two daughters, and actually they often joke that once they get married, they’ll be relieved, although it’s definitely not a joke anymore. My mom said that maybe she considers someone to be a live-in son-in-law because she thinks my younger sister is quite timid and cowardly, fearing she might not dare to resist her in-laws in the future.
That definitely isn’t about daring or not daring to resist; marrying into the family is related to inheritance issues. Without a son-in-law living at home, there would be no one to inherit the property.
But why must someone inherit, and why must it be a man? Giving their own biological daughter an equal share, isn’t that better for them? Moreover, the daughter is likely to get less, so they hold more money in their own hands. Are they hoping that a son-in-law will create more value to support them? Why are they willing to trust a stranger? Is it because the daughter, having married out, will inevitably spend more time serving and creating value for her husband’s family in the future? So they need to turn the daughter into a son-like role to get a son-in-law—half a family slave who can repay them?
I feel like this doesn’t solve my love-struck problem; it’s just that after losing faith in love, I simply enter a completely利益关系 (interest-based relationship), which seems more like trying to solve my issue.
Is it because children of the bourgeoisie are probably very difficult to reform, so it’s better to stay away and let them fend for themselves?
Our family still doesn’t know I broke up. I might go and try again with them. Although most likely he would say something nice like “as long as you’re happy,” but my mom seems to actually approve of my relationship with him. Of course, she only knows the good side, perhaps because she has been oppressed for so many years and understands what marriage is really like, so she just wants me to be happier.
Why must there be heirs? As I mentioned before, because capital can only be maintained through movement. Having heirs means there are people to support in old age; having heirs means that after losing the ability to exploit, they can still bring wealth to the individual family; having heirs, they will think of themselves as an essential part of the family and try every means to bring wealth to the family. Essentially, it’s a matter of money, a class status issue. Heirs are key to maintaining the wealth and class status of an individual family. Without heirs, the individual family cannot sustain itself.
Secondly, why must it be males? Because this society is a patrilineal inheritance system, women have no status. Private property is not about outsiders or insiders; it recognizes money, not people. When a son-in-law enters the family, he becomes an heir to the family property. Just based on this connection of property, he is no longer an outsider. As for why patriarchal society has persisted since the class society, this involves historical materialism. To save time, I quote my own reply from another post:
In primitive society, the physical differences between men and women were not significant, basically comparable. The reason men later dominated agriculture was not because they were physically stronger. Humans in primitive society were divided naturally by gender and age because women had menstruation, needed pregnancy, and had to care for children, so they could not leave the settlement far or for long. Therefore, women undertook all domestic labor and gathered food near the settlement. Agriculture developed from gathering, so women were actually the inventors of agriculture. At that time, all domestic work was done by women, and agriculture was a very important economic sector. All social activities were led by women, so the matriarchal society flourished during the early agricultural era.
As productivity developed, labor productivity increased, production scaled down, and division of labor became more detailed and specialized. To adapt to the smaller scale of production, both production and living units became smaller. Thus, the family structure shifted from group marriage to individual families, and private ownership factors increased, eventually leading to the establishment of individual families. After this, women’s domestic labor lost its social nature and became private household labor, which led to a decline in their social status.
The disintegration of matriarchal society is because women’s domestic labor lost its social character.
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I think this kind of chaotic statement is incorrect; reforming love-brained people still requires persuasion and education, using Marxism to change worldviews. If the思想 (thoughts) don’t change, no matter how many losses you suffer, it’s useless.
At the same time, I do not agree with Jihe’s statement that “children of the bourgeoisie are very difficult to reform, better to let them fend for themselves.” Even among children of the bourgeoisie, their personal experiences differ, and their thoughts vary; many of them are not even bourgeois but petty bourgeois, and they can still be reformed. In our association, there are some from bourgeois families who have been well reformed. I myself come from a bankrupt bourgeois family and still, through ideological struggle, have embarked on the Marxist path; Lu Xun also came from a declining bureaucratic landlord family.
Let me explain this matter. I have also communicated with Fenghuo and some others, so I will first share the chat records.
Fenghuo Flame: That Ji He is also dissatisfied with luanma
Fenghuo Flame: I think now is the best time to reform Ji He
Fenghuo Flame: If she is forced to marry, she might fall into nihilism, become a female slave, or turn into a激女 to engage in lesbian relationships
Fenghuo Flame: And luanma shouldn’t take pleasure in seeing others’ misfortune
A Comrade: The奴化 of people by old家庭 is very serious
luanma: Mainly referring to earlier times when I suggested to La Rui Shu that if the other party’s love brain思想 couldn’t be solved, then拖到对方结婚 or something
luanma: But later I saw Ji He’s思想转变, so I didn’t think that way anymore
luanma: Mainly referring to earlier times when I suggested to La Rui Shu that if the other party’s love brain思想 couldn’t be solved, then拖到对方结婚 or something
B Comrade: I feel like only when男权思想发作 can such words be spoken
luanma: At that time, I mainly thought that since things had become like this, then La Rui Shu’s continued接触对方 would cause更大的伤害, so it was better to拖到有转机
luanma: It was initially La Rui Shu主动去解释自己的错误思想, but later he explained more and more, and it seemed like the other person反而更“信服”, so I thought of Comrade C and his ex-girlfriend, and thought that it would be better to彻底断绝联系, continuing like this would only cause更大的伤害
luanma: Then I told La Rui Shu that since she knows which university you’re in and can’t physically断绝联系, then she should在思想上先坚决一点断绝联系, otherwise it would又勾起来 and又要骗人, then I想到烽火在论有产阶级恋爱思想里说的有产阶级恋爱很脆弱,会因为现实的利益比如搬家随便就断掉, then I thought that拖到对方因为资产阶级的现实利益放弃恋爱,断了念想就行了
luanma: At that time, I also considered whether to让拉瑞树继续坚持把问题解释清楚,继续诚恳地道歉, but then I thought that from the资产阶级立场, it was hard to say if she would have a正确的认识, so I thought better to快刀斩乱麻,男权思想倒没有考虑
luanma: Later, La Rui Shu said Ji He had agreed to write a self-introduction on the forum, so I thought since she said so, I couldn’t just打死一棍, still need to看她的表现, and later I saw that Ji He’s思想确实有所转变, so I didn’t think that way anymore
Fenghuo Flame: The bourgeois love is very脆弱, but love brain is very顽固
Fenghuo Flame: Without changing思想, in the future it will just换个人谈恋爱
Fenghuo Flame: Until being玩弄到身心俱疲 then堕落
luanma: At that time, I mainly thought that since Ji He had little hope of改造, if her love brain思想 couldn’t be solved, then拖到对方接受资产阶级子女成为新一代资产阶级的必然规律, and死心对不切实际的小资恋爱幻想 (also thinking about Fenghuo Flame评价葛菲的事情, saying that if Ge Fei becomes bourgeois, she wouldn’t think her parents’压迫是错的,反而会说自己家长当初压迫得对, then I thought that if Ji He doesn’t转变思想, she will最终变成成功版的葛菲), letting La Rui Shu继续保持联系也是害人, 对拉瑞树自己思想改造也不利, I mainly thought that since she is资产阶级家庭的子女, her subsequent恋爱 or other actions can’t be阻止
luanma: I didn’t have the意图 to看人倒霉然后以此为乐, mainly because I thought Ji He没有什么改造的可能, so I felt that even if she倒霉, I couldn’t do anything, as I also come from资产阶级家庭, which would否定我自己, then I would变得里外不是人
luanma: Whether it’s me, you, or other资产阶级家庭的子女, changing立场 is very difficult. Honestly, I haven’t been in the组织 for long, but I still have many资产阶级的毛病, some even very严重, so I understand how困难思想斗争 can be. For资产阶级子女 who have long immersed in资本主义社会, have no interest in马克思主义, and live comfortably without wanting革命, it’s very difficult to转变思想 just by听一席话. Many资产阶级子女 I’ve encountered are like this, so I think so. Just like the proletariat once hoped资产阶级 could peacefully hand over power, I also hoped that you or other资产阶级子女 could接受马克思主义, 转变立场, but such cases are very rare. Otherwise,马克思主义 wouldn’t emphasize the必然性 and importance of暴力革命 so much. But even so, I didn’t wish you倒霉; like others, I wanted to让拉瑞树停止欺骗你, ending this有产阶级恋爱 that would一直伤害你. We always believed that the main责任 lies with La Rui Shu, not you, and we never treated you as an enemy, even if you didn’t show明显的思想转变 at the time. Because of this, when you expressed willingness to write a self-introduction on the forum, I and others were quite surprised, watching how you would介绍自己 and whether you had truly转变思想, and we had some期待. When you unexpectedly转变思想 and愿意接受马克思主义, whether it was me, Fenghuo Flame, or others, we were very happy, glad that another小资产阶级愿意改造自己, and happy that a woman oppressed in capitalism found a path to解放.
I also made mistakes in this matter. First, I偏听偏信 La Rui Shu, didn’t fully了解你的情况, and directly片面地认为你没有改造的希望. Although I couldn’t believe you could definitely改造自己 without reason, it was still a mistake, and I apologize. Second, under everyone’s教育, I realized that although I didn’t intend to wish you倒霉, I didn’t really think about helping you after you came, but rather冷漠无情地觉得“活了最好，死了拉倒”, at most showing some同情资产阶级对他人遭遇, and being somewhat高兴 when you showed some进步, but I didn’t put all my efforts into helping others, which I should also apologize for. Third, after you raised questions, I also产生了小资产阶级的对抗情绪,觉得错误不在自己, self-righteous, but under大家的批评教育, I realized I wasn’t完全正确, and I should also向你道歉. That’s about it. I hope my explanation能让你满意.
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Actually, when I was writing that paragraph, I didn’t seem to have much dissatisfaction, I just imagined that if it really went in that direction, it would be too terrifying. The rare dissatisfaction was feeling that I shouldn’t have been judged so early, especially if you all, particularly tree, did that, I would hate him for a lifetime. Just thinking that I never intended to harm him, and he, in turn, becomes righteous for himself, pushing me into an unsolvable and terrifying situation, I find it really disgusting. Doing so almost desecrates Marxism. Of course, this kind of thing didn’t happen; although there were some twists and turns, there was also an opportunity for transformation. I can actually understand why the judgment of me was so pessimistic at that time; those petty bourgeois who could be transformed often had some spontaneity, but I hardly showed any at that time. I also have to admit that the little bits of Marxism I learned before engaging here didn’t make me have ideas of transforming the world or revolution. I was actively trying to understand because I found that this could to some extent explain my life, the world I know, and I wanted to understand what tree was thinking. Of course, these can’t be reasons for me to abandon a comfortable life and transform myself.
Actually, these might be useful to others, but for me, they only serve to make me more suspicious. I’m not sure if it’s because my love-obsessed thinking is more extreme than ordinary or if I am someone who must thoroughly investigate and understand everything I want to clarify. Even after asking questions and clarifying, I still need to fully understand before I can accept. (It’s the same as asking biology and geography questions in the past at the resource school.) I don’t know if these are related. I once recognized to some extent the evil of bourgeois men; after he confessed, I also thought at least he was honest and willing to change. But all this was based on the illusions I held about this relationship at the time. When he firmly broke up with me, I was on my way back from my hometown. Seeing his bizarre, emotionally charged posts that didn’t match, I directly had my mom drive to his old house. The fundamental reason was that he told me to abandon me, saying, “Revolution, everything is fake; I’d rather just lie in school like this.” I felt this was no longer a question of whether we should be in love but whether he could still live, so I thought he was completely self-destructive because I no longer recognized this person at all. These also couldn’t completely dispel my illusions about this relationship. Only later, after he explained more rationally and after your responses, did I gradually accept these.
I believe you wouldn’t enjoy my misfortune; except for those bourgeois who are still unrepentant about understanding Marxism, most wouldn’t treat me this way.
Actually, I would be a bit surprised about this because from my perspective, you really did help me change my thoughts and become better. Honestly, I’ve never been treated so sincerely and helpfully by people like you in my past life. I am truly touched by this. I didn’t even want to blame you, but I received more comprehensive explanations, and you also apologized for it. I really appreciate you all.
Changing stance is indeed very difficult; relying solely on my emotional understanding and good wishes is completely insufficient. I only know I don’t want to live that way for a lifetime, but in practice, it must be implemented everywhere. So I struggle in most things, hoping to continue ideological struggle and completely abandon a comfortable life. Fortunately, there is a place where I can be supervised and criticized, allowing me to absorb more correct ideas and have a clearer direction in future practice and transformation.
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I remembered when we went back to my grandparents’ house, my mom, although she said she also wanted to be a ‘teenage mama’s girl’ for ten days, often acted more politely than I did, and always hurried to pay with my uncle and aunt. Later, when we happened to talk about “here, we eat and stay using my uncle and aunt’s resources,” I said but this is also your home, and you are also supporting your grandparents. Including when visiting relatives, we always bring two sets of gifts, and I naively said, “Isn’t it just a formality? One gift from the whole family should be enough.” Later, my mom said that although her grandparents didn’t treat her and her uncle differently, and she was never a ‘support sister’ (扶弟魔) type, that was her uncle’s entire family, just half of it. I could see that when she talked about these, her expression was somewhat lonely. I didn’t know what to say, so I shifted the topic to me and my sister. Her meaning was that whether or not we find a son-in-law in the future, it would be the same for us. When I heard this, I felt that if I could find a son-in-law for my sister and give her any financial support while I didn’t want anything in return, I would feel more at peace and not owe them anything. This kind of thinking is essentially a form of exchange, and it’s also because I still feel that some warmth exists in this family that makes me hope to owe them less.
My mom knows that my self-control in commuting will affect my studies, but knowing I wasn’t happy in high school, she still agreed to pick me up and drop me off every day. During my repeat year, she almost every week traveled 150 kilometers to bring me something. She said she felt sorry for me staying there all the time. Our relationship is one where neither side easily compromises on small matters, and we often argue. I would also run to her room at 2 a.m. to ask her to teach me how to sew a hat, and we would talk until dawn. Every day, she sends red envelopes in a small group chat with my dad absent, claiming it’s just a game, but it’s obvious she’s worried about my living expenses and that I might fall in love and the other person would have to pay. Although my dad increased my living expenses after I started dating, the nature of it is somewhat different, but I can’t analyze how. I always feel that the money my mom gives contains more ‘warmth’.
Cedar mentioned I would miss the food at home, and I truly miss the chicken cooked by my grandma and the shredded potatoes as big as French fries. It’s definitely the taste I can’t do without, but I really think grandma is the best person to me, and I don’t know how to place such feelings.
Most of the time, my grandparents are farmers. Apart from my grandfather being a village secretary in the late 80s and 90s, he was also a Red Guard when he was young. They all have six siblings, and they are the eldest in their families, bearing the responsibility of lightening the burden for the family from a young age. Economically, they are the ‘worst-off’ among their siblings and also the most simple. I used to think that my relatives back home were very good, always helping each other with big and small matters. But after my grandma’s mother passed away, their true nature was revealed. Because my grandfather miscalculated an account, there was 5,000 yuan that was supposed to be split between two siblings, but they argued for a long time. Both families are in business, with Mercedes-Benz and BMW cars. They clearly didn’t lack this 5,000 yuan, but the argument was endless, almost leading to physical violence. Grandma couldn’t bear it and tried to mediate, but was pushed down by one person and fell, fracturing her right hand. One family took care of grandma’s surgery, but neither family mentioned who should pay for it. That was the first time I saw how vicious they could be, but I didn’t think from the perspective that they were all bourgeoisie.
Although we treat my grandparents well, they are always reluctant to trouble us. Even my grandfather said that when he becomes paralyzed, he doesn’t want anyone to deal with his waste, and if that happens, he’d rather just die. I don’t quite understand why he thinks that way.
I think my biggest problem is that I even feel that economic exchanges are mixed with feelings. It’s probably because I still can’t accept that everything is purely an economic relationship.
This already contains too much information. Has Ji He ever thought about its deeper implications? Your mom’s so-called “mama’s boy” is just a casual remark, but in reality, she is a married daughter, long since someone else’s labor force and property, not part of the maternal family, so she must be polite. Your mom also made it clear that your grandparents’ house belongs to your uncle; she is just an outsider. This reflects the current state of patriarchal inheritance society: daughters cannot inherit property and can only be sold as a one-time commodity, while sons are the future masters of the family. The only exception is when a daughter gains inheritance rights through marriage, but this is not common and is usually achieved through a son-in-law marriage. Your mom indeed mentioned this, and when you talked about your family, including yourself and your sister, I suppose you have no brothers, so how is the inheritance handled? It must be through a son-in-law marriage. From this, it is very clear that in bourgeois families, parent-child relationships are purely monetary; children are tools for inheriting, maintaining, and increasing family wealth.
The reason for this is that your mom is a family slave, responsible for all household chores, raising children, and maintaining household finances. This is actually a reflection of female slavery: men do not handle chores or household finances but still enjoy all the benefits, while women, as household slaves, have to worry about these even more. The so-called warmth you feel is because it’s always your mom managing family relationships, not your dad—your dad is just a slave master who benefits passively.
This is because your grandma is an outsider from your great-grandmother’s family, a married daughter with no status. Therefore, your grandma’s relatives felt she had no right to interfere in your great-grandmother’s estate (which is actually her family’s property, i.e., your great-grandfather’s estate).
Because families are complex, made up of complicated people, with complex class components and thoughts. Your grandfather’s family has experienced the old era, and some of his thoughts are influenced by that. I’m not sure about his class stance. The exact relationship between you and each family member needs specific analysis. But I think it’s better not to be overly naive and purely emotional—such shallow understanding isn’t enough. To conclude that relationships are not purely monetary, there must be evidence. I wouldn’t casually categorize all familial relationships as purely financial without investigation; specific analysis is necessary.
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Rather than saying that the dowry system is about women having inheritance rights, it is more accurate to say that it turns the son-in-law into a foster son of the father-in-law, and then he inherits the family estate from his adoptive father. The so-called “children following the mother’s surname” is actually just a scam; the truth is that the child’s maternal grandfather’s surname is used. In more extreme cases, some sons-in-law even change their surname to match their wife’s, but this isn’t really about sharing the wife’s surname; it’s about sharing the surname of the wife’s father. Since they become sons, they naturally take their father’s surname, so they are considered “family members.” This also highlights how absurd and ironic the so-called “naming rights” promoted by bourgeois feminism really are.
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;Actually, the most frank about this are the Japanese. The so-called “son-in-law adoption” system is very prevalent in Japan. The ruling class there often inherits their wealth by adopting their sons-in-law as their own sons, called “son-in-law adoptees,” who then change their surname to match the adoptive family and inherit the estate, continuing the family line. Some ethnic minorities in remote areas of China and certain Han Chinese in special circumstances also have the son-in-law adoption system; for example, Li Bai was like this, though he did not go as far as changing his surname.
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;Of course, this son-in-law adoption system also reflects the strength of feudal forces. During the Tang Dynasty, when aristocratic clans and large landowners were powerful, the system was very prevalent because many small and medium landowners like Li Bai had to rely on this method to attach themselves to the aristocratic landlord class. Later, the Yellow Turban Rebellion wiped out the aristocratic clans, and China no longer had aristocratic clans (if not for the Yellow Turban Rebellion, China might still have noble families and royal remnants like in Europe, with centuries or over a thousand years of history). The son-in-law system declined. However, Japan, with its long-standing feudal large estate system, often had regional dominance by large landlords who called themselves kings, so the son-in-law adoption system persisted. By the time of the Meiji Restoration, because the large landlord class was not completely eliminated and participated in state power, the system continued. Even after World War II, when Japan’s large landowners became bourgeois, this system persisted to today, making it very reactionary.
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;Of course, this is not unique to Japan. In countries with strong reactionary ruling classes and incomplete revolutions, such phenomena are common. For example, in Rome, it was common for emperors to adopt heirs to inherit the throne (skipping the step of marrying the emperor’s daughter, instead marrying a widow and having her son succeed). In Germany, the old monopoly capital Krupp, after the extinction of the direct line, was personally granted marriage by the German Emperor to the daughter of the Krupp family, making her husband adopt Krupp and inherit the estate. Mussolini’s son-in-law was once considered Mussolini’s heir. Sukarno’s son-in-law in Indonesia also inherited Sukarno’s position and became the president, representing the comprador class of Indonesian fascism.
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;Overall, the son-in-law system, or the indirect way of treating women as part of the patriarchal inheritance system, is generally rare. Such cases usually occur either because the family has no male heirs or because they want to transfer benefits to another family by adopting someone to inherit their estate. Most of the time, the estate is inherited directly by the biological son from his own father.
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Regarding what Ji and He said, and about not knowing how to view my feelings towards my grandmother, I think you can take a look at “Clear Distinctions Between Right and Wrong in Love and Hatred.” It contains an article about “What kind of parental love do we need.” Parental love for children also has class distinctions. For example, your bourgeois father believes that giving you money and spending on you is good, and he is not afraid that you are a “perpetually green stock.” On the other hand, proletarians, such as the son of the German revolutionary leader, the son of the German working class, Taiman, would never behave like that towards his daughter. Your grandmother, as a feudal parent, interacts with you based on her class stance and past practices, which determine her worldview. Her attitude towards children is also part of this, so to analyze her behavior and attitude towards you, we need to start from her class position. Take my grandfather as an example: he was once a model worker during the socialist period, sent to the army by the brigade, and also received education during the Cultural Revolution. He worked in the kitchen of the army, learned about criticizing Lin Biao and Deng Xiaoping through broadcasts, and knew about the criticism of Deng as a capitalist roader within the party. However, after the restoration of revisionism, he inherited a few acres of land and some property from his father, bought a large truck, and became a petty bourgeoisie who drove trucks to transport goods, even hiring one or two people to drive for him and forming a convoy. The worldview he formed in the past changed accordingly, becoming narrow and selfish, only caring about his own small territory. After I accidentally learned about the background of the restoration of revisionism, I spent some time finding evidence around me to verify these previously unknown historical facts. Once, during a chat, my grandfather mentioned that he knew China was not a socialist country, that Deng Xiaoping was a capitalist roader, and he told me how the broadcasts in the army criticized Deng as a capitalist roader within the party. He also said that Chairman Mao’s era was good, and the people saw the light. However, he still hoped I wouldn’t learn more and just wanted me to “live peacefully, finish college, have a promising future, and live my own good life.” He was afraid I would seek out more information about the past and told me, “When the true Communist Party (opposing revisionism) comes to our side, we can go, but if they don’t come, we won’t be the first to go.” His thinking was very conservative and backward, hindering my understanding of the truth and participation in revolution, which can be considered very reactionary. I also once wondered how to view his kindness to me when I was a child and his current words to me: “Hope you live peacefully all your life.” It was only after the help of everyone and a preliminary decision to follow the revolutionary path, and after my worldview had changed to some extent, that I understood that their attitude towards us is determined by their worldview, and our attitude towards their feelings is also determined by our worldview. After reading “Clear Distinctions Between Right and Wrong in Love and Hatred,” perhaps you will understand some things better. Many articles in this book are very good, including “People with the Surname Confucius Are Not One Family.” You can also take a look. “It is great ideas that make us relatives.” Members of revolutionary organizations are closer to each other than family, caring for each other both in thought and life because everyone shares the same revolutionary ideals. If you pursue a life of eating, drinking, enjoyment, and parasitic comfort, you will not refuse and may even care deeply about the so-called “warmth” from relatives. But if you pursue the path of social revolution, you will find a group of like-minded people, abandon those who have blood relations but no common language or future, or even hinder your independence and revolutionary commitment. Naturally, you will reject the superficial feelings they give you.
“Clear Distinctions Between Right and Wrong in Love and Hatred” and Young Comrades on Class Analysis 1976.pdf (3.2 MB)
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I will read this book. Actually, whether those warm feelings can be let go depends more on myself. Analyzing their worldview, analyzing the purpose of their love is part of it, but it is true that as long as I am still the same as in the past or always lazy and indecisive, even the most obvious and disgusting love, even if I think it’s bad, I will accept it.
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